I am forced by the passing of time, the transition of life stages, and the expectations of society to grow up and to behave like a "grown-up" (whatever that would constitute). But here, I would just be a little childish, a little self-centered, a little irresponsible, a little too honest but also a little too pretentious.

24, and still counting.




Kept all my past posts intact because my past was what made me, me. Deleting them doesn't change who I am so I revisit my memories sometimes, to learn and to laugh at my past mistakes.

(Just kidding, I revert some posts to drafts because I'm utterly embarrassed.)


January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
October 2012
November 2012
April 2013
May 2013
August 2013
September 2013
October 2013
November 2013
December 2013
January 2014
February 2014
March 2014
April 2014
May 2014
June 2014
July 2014
August 2014
October 2014
November 2014
December 2014
January 2015
February 2015
March 2015
April 2015
May 2015
June 2015
July 2015
July 2016
October 2016
December 2016
January 2017
March 2017
April 2017
May 2017
June 2017
July 2017
October 2019
December 2019
April 2020
May 2020


Designed by: Ahting

Time: 9.58AM

And I’m 50% done with University life at this juncture. Year 2 Semester 2 finals were over last week and it’s now my second summer break. ... Oh it just started raining. Sweet. I was anticipating it and it’s really nice when it finally came. (I think like 70% of my blog posts are written while it’s raining LOL)

Time: 10:22AM

... Confession: I have just stared into space for the past 20 minutes at this random Starbucks I decide to camp at. To be honest I had other plans today but it changed and I’m kind of disappointed about it. So yours truly decides that it’s a good idea to think about why would I be affected by this and ... basically reflect who I am as a person. Fun fact: recently I thought it’s quite funny to say the phrase “it’s who I am as a person” in the most inappropriate situations ever while pretending that I believe it’s an appropriate situation to use the phrase. Hais my humour can’t be helped, it’s who I am as a person. LOL yes I just giggled to myself thinking it is punny HAHAHHA

Time: 10:32AM

Now that I think about it, I can’t believe that Zabby and Enrico was just here last semester. It felt like it had been a year since they have been gone. ... Maybe because it was such a different semester that it didn’t sink in that it happened one after another.

I really really missed Zabby because she had a “Wern-effect” on me. They are such people who make you feel that possibilities are endless, that you should test your boundaries, “be wild” and “be free”. It’s like I’m the confetti in their hands which they throw in the air and let me be carried by the wind but also there for me if I am to fall (this analogy just made me teary omg. Not only because it’s so true but it also made me really really miss them). Thrown confetti like I’m a celebration and they always make me feel that they are really proud of me, someone worth loving and celebrating, and someone they believe in.

... I really dislike this long-distance-friendship.

Time: 10:47AM

My green tea latte had turned cold. Sad. And the rain has stopped. Why. It’s like everything is hanging in the air and not flowing down nicely. Hmmm.. Am I speaking of the weather or are these my thoughts?

There’s this couple sitting a table away from me. They came at about 10:05AM. The girl look like she’s in her early 20s, wearing what looks like she just woke up in, a black spaghetti strips top and a flimsy short that barely covers her butt cheek. Her hair, dyed a light brown and is slightly curly, every time she shifts it to the sides, bearing her shoulders and collarbones, I wonder if it makes the guy flutters. The guy, pleasantly plum and seemingly in his 30s, is, in contrast, wearing office wear and have his hair already waxed. His double chin protruding as he lean forward, across the table and nearer to the girl. But she’s the one who made contact first, gently rubbing his arm, “there there” … Maybe I have enough people-watching today.

But then again, am I people-watching or writing this from some distant blurry memory?

Time: 11:11AM

Used to be a cute time of a day which we would even announce in class (by that I mean secondary school days LOL) to make wishes. Just for fun of course but still with a bit of hope. Now I stared at the time and I’m not wishing for anything anymore.

Time: 11:13AM

I think what I have been writing has been quite “choppy” thus far. Like picking up a book, selectively reading a few pages before opening up another book again. A guy is sitting at the table behind me, and has been reading for a good half an hour or so. I wish I can settle down like that and indulge in reading. I do have a book in my bag borrowed from the school library, titled “Passion without Reason”. NO IT IS NOT “THAT” KIND OF PASSION HAHAHAH.

It’s a book about altruism, a book seeking why people give without seeking something in return. But of course I’m not seeking answers, maybe just another perspectives, another peek at someone’s attempt at reasoning this. Not sure if I will get around to reading it, or remain, the frog in the well.

11:43AM

I got distracted reading someone else’s writings on her personal site. Made me wonder have we ever realized just how much we’re close to someone’s pain and how much we have actually meant to them when we were able to bring them joy.

I think I am actually on a very fine and vulnerable line of being optimistic and pessimistic. … And now I am currently wobbling on that very line.

11:49AM

OKAY I WILL STOP BEING WISHY-WASHY. So speaking of being wishy-washy, towards the end of this semester, I was made to face with one of the hardest decision-making moments in my life. ... And that, will be the story I will be writing another day. LOL.

Labels: Books, Life, Rants, Updates

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