I am forced by the passing of time, the transition of life stages, and the expectations of society to grow up and to behave like a "grown-up" (whatever that would constitute). But here, I would just be a little childish, a little self-centered, a little irresponsible, a little too honest but also a little too pretentious.

24, and still counting.




Kept all my past posts intact because my past was what made me, me. Deleting them doesn't change who I am so I revisit my memories sometimes, to learn and to laugh at my past mistakes.

(Just kidding, I revert some posts to drafts because I'm utterly embarrassed.)


January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
October 2012
November 2012
April 2013
May 2013
August 2013
September 2013
October 2013
November 2013
December 2013
January 2014
February 2014
March 2014
April 2014
May 2014
June 2014
July 2014
August 2014
October 2014
November 2014
December 2014
January 2015
February 2015
March 2015
April 2015
May 2015
June 2015
July 2015
July 2016
October 2016
December 2016
January 2017
March 2017
April 2017
May 2017
June 2017
July 2017
October 2019
December 2019
April 2020
May 2020


Designed by: Ahting

Full day band for the past three days . Thursday was rehearsal for yesterday's performance . Very very tiring . RV ishh a pretty demanding school . Had technical run for dunno how long , most poor thing ishh the back stage crew , who had to move everything and tio scold when things go wrong . It was one of those days when you feel like complaining about anything and everything . But of cause guai me as always kept everything inside me . :)

24th June (Friday) - Cluster performance ,
Yuhua and 3 other primary schools came over to perform with us at RV . Had great fun with the yuhua percuz . Love die their lovely sense of humor ( including their alumni's . heh . ) . Esp the time back stage . :x Truth be told , it was much more memorable than being onstage that day . The performance was horrible . Lawls . I think it was me who slowed everyone down during ' Memories of Friendship ' . No mood for band recently uhh , too long no prac then suddenly everyday got . Sian much ? Sadly , i cant remember any hilarious convo or moments about that day currently and i cant share the joy i had that day . Pity . :/

25th June (Saturday) - SYF showcase ,
Creepy ttm . Felt almost exactly like Friday except that Friday was more fun . Caught myself wondering where yuhua was throughout the whole day . Like , i keep thinking they're there when they're not and i keep looking out for them . Performance was better that day though . And cheers cheers ! It ended quite early . Went out with Fengxian and Malcolm for dinner at Carl's Jr. Sat there talking for like about 2 hours mostly with Fengxian asking cute questions and Malcolm sharing his epic life when he was our age . Tempted by him to do " exciting " things . LOL . And it was one of those moments when you wish time could stop and you could just sit there and talk forever .

Do you feel like i've changed ? I felt like i've change . And i start asking myself questions i've never thought of before .
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If i were a scale , i would chose to be a major scale . I never liked the minor scale much actually , what with all it's harmonic and melodic minors . Minor scales always sounds clashy to me . Like , you're not suppose to play this note but you have to play it , for well , it's in the scale . The notes sounds like it doesn't fit . And if it were a character , it would be of some character who have a different opinion which somehow always seem to clash with others , it's all about "clashing" , and if i dont watch out , i would sooner be a "minor scale" . Major scales are different , they sound better (personally) and people cans play them better (generally) .

They have this aural section in piano , (to test your pitching and hearing) , and there's this part in which the examiner will play a song and we have to answer a few questions about the song like , what era , what time signature , what expression and then , there's whether it's in major or minor . When i was younger , i will tikam tikam whether it was major or minor , i couldn't tell the difference between major and minor then . okays , actually , idk what's the meaning of that qns when i was younger . LOL . but now , when i'm asked that question , i'd chose minor if the song sounds 'clashy' , like , the notes collide instead of coming together in harmony . And yesh , i do get it correct (more often) now . :P


Recently , my days are filled with band agains , was thinking of something similar to the above when i was having sectionals . Just that i couldn't phrase it out in the exact feeling , tone and words now . :/ Anyways , i like Eugene Tang being in our section that twerp . Suddenly just snorted when it was totally quiet and Ms Chan was talking . AND THEN managing to keep a straight face but caused me to cant stop giggling . It's like those many times when i rmb a joke that i think was epic funny when i was getting scolded or counseled . And the more i try to stop laughing , the harder i laughed . One of the many moments in life of me doing something at inappropriate times .

` Friends are the enharmonics in music . Enharmonic sounds exactly the same , just that they have a different name .

Hearing those screamings behind those walls , my heart breaks for you and i feel so guilty . Always hearing you complain why ishh it so unfair . Why ishh it you he picked on instead of me . The thing ishh , the thing ishh he does pick on me . And the emotional pain he once gave me was worst than you cans imagine . He took away your freedom . Yesh . And mine too . He stole your childhood . That's what i have been through . He robs you of your joy and warmth at home . I lived four years more of that pain than you . He lash at you mercilessly . So did i suffer the same pain . What he din do to you , yet , was taking away the love others unconditionally gives to you . Dont whine , dont back down , dont think of ending your life , even if i said that before myself . Wait , wait till you find the girl who'll show you the world , then you'll realize , living ishh worth it . :) He might be able to break your smile into two , but dont let him break your heart or your soul .
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Been a week since i last posted . Actually wanted to create a new blog and leave this behind but then , not really any significant happening for me to do so . And well , i realise i cant let go of all those memories . Anyways , been a very learning week . Almost everyday for the past week , i learn something new , had a new experience , or see a new place . ( and no i didn't really had much progress with my homework ) :x

Been doing this confession thingy on fb . Found out , and rmb things i thought i forgot while trying to rack my brains for confessions , for stuffs people din know , or might never guess about me . For the past year , i haven't really say things from the bottom of my heart , or deep in my mind online anymore . I was afraid of what i let slip , of what i dont want people to know , whether here on Blogger or on Facebook . As i grow up , i became more aware of my audiences , of who's judging me .

I realise with regrets that , though once upon a time , i will hang out with anyone who felt like fun or friendly , heck caring the rumors and occasionally their horrible attitude , i too , have became one of those type of people i hate , those people who wont be friends with just anyone . Those people who chose and pick their circle of friends , hoping to protect their heart and themselves from possible pains from others who might hurt myself .
And so today , i reflect and change . I shall no longer push others away from me , and be with them , cause i like their company , and not cause i want someone to take away my loneliness and cause i want to be able to accept everyone unconditionally around me agains . I really want to be a better me . And i do try , you'll see . :)


11th - 13th June (Weekends) - Over at Malaysia ,
Been to Malaysia . First time meeting my baby cousin who was born earlier this year in January . Cant help loving him . But after my granny of cause . (L) . I'm proud to say , that as i get older , i start to help out more with the housework and the cooking when i go to my granny's house . Had you seen me at my granny's house 2 years ago , i would be slacking in the living room , watching shows after shows , disc after disc , changing channels after channels , waiting for people to call me for meals , or going out to play .

But when i went back this time , i began helping out . Taking care of the baby , washing the dishes after lunch ( a huge achievement mind you . :P usually my granny's cooking made me so blissfully full i just want to go and slack at the sofa , which i've always been doing . well , till now ) , preparing the meals , looking after the baby , washing my own clothes ( hand wash ! ) etc . Maybe i'm trying to act guai in front of the baby ? haha . no . Cause i've come to see , what others have been doing for me . Taking care of me without complaints and i want to start doing my part . Er well ... bit by bit . :x

And the thing ishh , i do enjoy helping around the house . Esp spending time with my granny in the kitchen . Apparently , it makes her more happy than seeing me gorging down her food . And it makes me really happy too . Spending all those time with her . Though i'm like making things worse than helping . :x And looking after the baby , i learnt to be more careful . The baby ishh like real fragile ( oh and did i mention adorable ? ) and he'll really takes up alot of your attention . My favourite things about babies ishh their smile , after their tiny hands and feet . ARGH . i'm so jealous of his tiny hands !

` taught , by the tiniest beings of life , of how to love , and be loved . ♥

16th June (Thursday) - Percussion bbq ,
The second bbq i have in my 15 long tiring years of life on Earth . Yesh . Yours truly ishh tremendously good at exaggerating . But nevertheless , it's a fact . :P and this time , being the organizer of this really last minute thing , i was really happy that i went and that i made it happen . ... though idk if the others feel that it was as good as i felt .
Tried bonding with the year 1s and it was very .... trying . Seems like a long year ahead after the year 4s step down , which ishh a big worry ( referring to the year 4s stepping down , not the bonding with the year 1s . .... yet ) the year 1s seem reluctant to open up to the rest of the perc and idk why . :/ And sadly , not everyone went . So hopefully it'll be better next year . And i really do hope that the juniors will love taking photos more . It's very turn-off-ish that they dont like to camwhore .

BBQ was at Cassandra's condo , her awesome ttm parents helped us set up the pit and thanks to them it was very successful . First time in my memory cooking at the pit and hell was it exhausting . Good learning experience , and i think i DO have a talent in everything i do ! :D not the genius those type like , try once perfect but those GENUINE TALENTS , like , everything you try you cans do it right . Maybe not perfect but generally acceptable . Okays , shall stop my ego growing .


17th June (Friday) - On the fields oh-so-green ,
Eventful friday . :) Had AL test in the morning . Was panicking about it the night before . Felt like pon-ing at the last minute . But i decided to go in the end , cause i decided that even if i were to display and humiliate myself with my ignorance , i cans take this as a learning experience instead . And learn i did . Had drills in the morning . ALs were suppose to take the drills . When asked to volunteer , i did want to at a time , but idk why i had this feeling that i dont the the right to . Which ishh my biggest weakness i think . Another big mistake was taking antibiotic without taking breakfast . Guess i dont have to say more .

After leaving school , met up with Amy(L) and Gladys(L) to go shopping . Or so we thought . Had lunch at KFC before going to pierce my ear ( random crave ) then had a hard decision of where to go . In the end went marina barrage . First time being there . If only the weather was less sunny , everything would have been so much more perfect . Speaking of perfect , if i get to buy that singlet i saw at JP , then , THAT would have really been perfection . Haha . Really love going out with Au and Geeladys . Things that dont seem funny usually , suddenly seems hilarious . ♥

Oh and before i forgot , this ishh something that i want to rmb for life . As a reminder of how silly Amy cans be . Apparently , she know of this game in which you slap the person if he or she laughs , and if you yourself laugh , he or she cans slap you . So , the more you laugh , the more you're slapped , and the more you're slapped , the more you laugh . Well , until you get pissed of course . But idk why , at that time , the idea was so hilarious we couldn't stop laughing . LOL !
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Caught Tangled ( some pretty long ago de movie ) on tape yesterday . Pretty charming . Why din they make Rapunzel a Disney Princess like the princess in Princess and the Frog . :/ Though i admit it's hard to decide whether her image should be longggg hair or the final short hair . Speaking of Rapunzel , i think Barbie As Rapunzel not bad too . Got the disc of the movie since i was like , really young , when i had none of the family prob stuffs . Anyways , something i've learnt from Tangled ? Glowing hair cans be freaky to guys . Dont think too much . Sometimes , when someone leaves you , they have their reasons . Sometimes , when you hear some rumors , it might not be true .

Went to school to mug agains today . Well , tried to . In the end grab the holiday homework left in the classroom and zao to jurong library . You know , the big big one . The top floor cans eat one . .... Well , which ishh what i did . Eat . Eat . ... And eat . :x Speaking of eating , feels that i have quite alot of good food recently . P: And going to malaysia tomorrow morning . EVEN MORE good food . (Y) not that i dont worry about my appearance , i think my waist getting too big ler , :/ OH AND , talking about food , i think comics connection dont sell the Crayon Shin Chan biscuit anymore . Sad right . Idk where else to find le . Haish . Thank god there's always ice-cream ♥ Ah and i had Caramel milk tea at Koi today . Nice . :D

Hmmm ... i rmb i was saying something else before i got distracted . UH HA yesh . Was talking about today . So i went to Jurong library , din do much other than eat and laugh and laugh and eat there today . Then after that skipped lunch and went to the NEW Clementi mall to window-shop with Kellie (L) , i think she din really enjoyed herself but personally , i think it was pretty okays cause i got a new , and relatively cheap , pair of shorts . Although i do have quite alot of clothes already but they all very weird and unusual ( like seriously ) and i dont really have shorts so ... despite going broke , .... agains , really really hearts that shorts . Ahhhh .... ♥
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Trained all the way to Suntec to catch Kungfu Panda 2 in the evening . Had Sakae before the show . My brother and my mother's first time eating Sakae . Undoubtedly interesting . My brother keep taking plates of food from the conveyer belt as though it's for free and all , should have brought him to those buffet type next time . P: Anyways , the show was not bad . Just that i din laugh as much as i expected myself to . They say it's not as nice as the number 1 de , but then , i never watch Kungfu Panda 1 before . The Panda's character reminded me of 3 ppl - Felicia Ng Shi Ni ♥ and Tan Jia Wen ♥ and Brandon Tan ♥ . Very blur , naive , cute , chubby , innocent and have a " fist for justice " ( kind-hearted ) , and esp Jiawen , will forever try to help others da bao bu ping although there's nothing she cans do to help in some situations . Very very fun people to be around uhh . Those personalities which you cans get jealous over . But nevertheless , there's sth every movie wants to bring across each time and in this adorable comedy , i learnt that love from the family cans get you very far .


Bused around Sungei Buloh's sheep/goat farm , mushroom farm , organic farm , walking in the rain at all these a typical singaporean teenager would never thought about going to . Was there on a duty of taking care of little kids , a task given to me by the temple i once schooled at . The most memorable happening of the trip , was not only of that unforgettable friendship i've forged with this K1 little boy and his P1 brother , but was that of how i stood in the rain despite my own (serious) flu to shelter the little kids with all the umbrella i have on hand . We stood in a line , sheltering the kids from the bus to the entrance of the place and we made sure that not a single one of them got wet . If i were not so busy holding up an umbrella , i would have taken a photo . LOL . I dont know about those kids , but it's one trip that i wont ever forget anytime soon .




Finally satisfied my Subway crave ( FOR FOUR MONTHS OMG ) yesterday . But had tummy ache so din quite enjoyed it as much as i want to . Sigh . :/ Spent practically the whole morning in school today . Doing maths . :D Doing quite a abit of the holiday homework ler . But afternoon went to shop at JP agains . DARN . Everytime i bring money out , i come back with very very little left . Bought angry birds plushies today . Actually have been eyeing and saving up for this singlet for quite long but din get it in the end . ( Broke . Agains . LOL . )Anyways , my brother wants the angry birds too de uhh . Friends before self . Becoming my new motto . P: But brother in this case . Rented 'Inception' for him to watch too , though i've watch it i think it's worth sharing it with my family , but if he dont get the plot then a bit waste my money . :/ OH WELL , Aint about the money money money ~~
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Sick for the past three weeks . 220511-290511 was in Fujian . In Fujian was runny nose like siao now in Singapore coughing like siao . Past two days cant even sleep at night . :/ But i learnt alot in Fujian . Did alot of reflections , and yeshhh it's a must to do reflections , so between you and me , we din have much time to really enjoy . Haish . Missed band camp also when i got back . Totally slept away the beginning of my holidays . And idk if i'm getting better . See two doctors alr and they keep giving me stronger and stronger antibiotics . Then when i say got headache , the doctor give me even more pills to fight the headache then now all the pills in my stomach spoiling my stomach liner ( or whatever you call it ) . And it's like damn pain . But i cannot stop eating the pills in case all the germs come back . Pained and tired . Sian ._.

Moreover got a lot of studies to catch up on . Miss quite a lot of lessons while being away in Fujian , probably gonna book consultation time with Mr Chng and Mr Chan , hmmm .... i wonder if others are interested .... But seriously alot of homework uhh . Later i work too much all the illness come back how ? Lawls . Not like i'm working much . But seriously super piss . Just now finally go do a bit of the Fujian report due this friday . Progress was very good then suddenly black out . There was no back up copy cause the microsoft word i was using was old version de then end up now getting writer's block and alot of good ideas gone . Sian die .___.

And , if you cant tell by now that i'm in a very very sian mood , good luck to you cause it's about to get worse . BLEH . JK . Okays , in a feeble attempt to cheer myself up , i'm going to think about .... ISABELLELAIZIYING . Slept with her in the same room for 7 nights , 4 nights on the same bed until she kana sick like me . Oppos . Piss her off until idk how say with my jie pi habits . :x Kana late tgt , complain about ahemahemblahblahblah tgt , watch tv till late late tgt (actually only her , i sleep super early uhh) , shop tgt , take photos tgt ..... sometimes some things were so funny i thought i might die laughing from it . They say it's not the days that we'll rmb , but the moments that make the day , (L)

Oh , and girl i miss you . :(

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