I am forced by the passing of time, the transition of life stages, and the expectations of society to grow up and to behave like a "grown-up" (whatever that would constitute). But here, I would just be a little childish, a little self-centered, a little irresponsible, a little too honest but also a little too pretentious.

24, and still counting.




Kept all my past posts intact because my past was what made me, me. Deleting them doesn't change who I am so I revisit my memories sometimes, to learn and to laugh at my past mistakes.

(Just kidding, I revert some posts to drafts because I'm utterly embarrassed.)


January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
April 2011
May 2011
June 2011
July 2011
August 2011
September 2011
October 2011
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
February 2012
March 2012
April 2012
May 2012
October 2012
November 2012
April 2013
May 2013
August 2013
September 2013
October 2013
November 2013
December 2013
January 2014
February 2014
March 2014
April 2014
May 2014
June 2014
July 2014
August 2014
October 2014
November 2014
December 2014
January 2015
February 2015
March 2015
April 2015
May 2015
June 2015
July 2015
July 2016
October 2016
December 2016
January 2017
March 2017
April 2017
May 2017
June 2017
July 2017
October 2019
December 2019
April 2020
May 2020


Designed by: Ahting

Random photos there . That's Tania and taken during the Cambodia trip . Thinking i look pretty in there so i just post it . And later got this photo with Gladys who came over on the last day of the march holiday , then a photo with Rio taken during class and a photo with Amy when we went to do CID and watched Timeless ( more like Senseless ) Love . P: Anyways , shall go back what I actually wanted to talk about . Which is something I don’t usually like to talk about and which I normally do talk about actually . Wth I’m digressing . ._.

Do I have a family problem ? When asked , ( by , hear hear ! , a teacher . … agains ? ) I was like okay ah normal ah . But then I suddenly realize maybe what I consider normal just aint what others consider normal . Many a times , we see on fb , twitter , blogs etc. , outburst of teenagers annoyed by their parents for controlling their life , for not understanding them , being unreasonable so on and so forth . But why , why do they have this need to tell the whole world , or even show the whole world that they don’t mind cursing their parents .

Everyone has their own problems . 家家有本难念经 . It’s just different extremities . The day after parent teaching meeting , I had one of those meeting . Those sort of moments that will spark an outburst like “ Why ishh my parents like this ?! ” “ What do you want from me ?! ” sort of moment . ... Thank god I’ve no anger management problem . Anyways , my brother has been saying that we pitying our dad cause of his anger management issues which definitely strain relationships between him and the rest of the world . But I realize , recently , that it aint pity . it was ... pain . 心酸 you know . Cause regardless of our conflicts and misunderstanding , suspicious and quarrels , we still love each other ( shit too cheesy and corny ) . When one of us have burdens or trouble in life we’ll worry for each other . I just hope that I aint another burden to my parents anymore than I am now . :/


And speaking of family issues and parents , was talking to Wai Hong de other day . ( Yes it’s so memorable and on-my-mind that I’ve to post about it ) About his life , his dream , his future . And I gotta admit , I’m goddamn envious of him . He knows what he want to do in life , he knows that when he grow up , he wants to dance . That’s it , simple as that , dance . The passion , the conformity , the joy in finding what you really love … I wonder when will I feel that .

I love interacting with people . I love presentations , speeches , and talk till it’ll leave people thinking , “ gosh what was that all about ” , the way conversations leave impacts on one’s mind . I love writing , I love how my handwriting looks like , I love my personal style that will sometimes come out as I write . But no I don’t want to be an author . I don’t have enough passion or talent . Perhaps blogging ishh the most I cans do . For my passion of writing I mean .

For the interacting part . I love psychology . I love studying how the mind works . What kind of colours you like will give you what kind of character , what season defines your character etc. I love serving people , knowing people , talking to people , entertaining people . Did I mention I was once inspired to be a teacher ? So there goes me and my divided direction . I wanna write , I wanna counsel people , and now I wanna teach ... Oh and I wanna adopt kids too . LOL .

But well , Wai Hong , he’s different . He’ve that one goal . And maybe he’s not afraid that he wont earn enough or he wont be able to compete with others ( that particular fear traps me from wanting to do a lot of things ) . And maybe his family ishh standing in his way ( I dont think ANY parent will just be that supportive if their child chose to do Arts when they grow older . It’s a stereotype thinking actually , that if you want to be an artist you’re either ALL or nothing . ) But they always say when there’s a will there’s a way . And for that , I wish you all the best dude ! GO . ALL . THE . WAY . (:

Speaking of my passion of writing , my brother had this compulsory compo writing competition within the school and it was an open topic thing so he asked me to give him a topic . And I did . And as I did , I also wrote the compo myself . Entitled , “ A Roller Coaster Ride . ” A bit cliché that it’ll be about life aint it ? Well it's kinda what i think about everyday i guess :/

A Roller Coaster Ride

I open my eyes and I’m falling again. I lost my breath and immediately kept my eyes shut tight , desperately hoping that this whole roller coaster ride will be over soon.
I’m acrophobia, meaning to say that I’m afraid of heights. So you might ask just what am I doing on a roller coaster?
Well, it’s my twenty-first birthday and my parents say they know just what the best is for me. They say it will help me overcome my fear, the very same fear that stopped me from scaling Mount Fuji when we went to Japan, stopped me from climbing the Great Wall of China when I went to it with the school, the very same fear that made me the laughing stock of the whole army last year when we had to climb the rock wall that was barely 4 meters tall.
And despite knowing the dire consequences, I mean, hey, how would someone whose not acrophobic know what’s best for me? I still took on the challenge, and went on my very first roller coaster ride.
Before I got on, I was so sure that it’s going to be okay. I looked and looked at the roller coaster and the people riding it. People were screaming, and I told myself, they were cheering, cheering that they had conquered their fear. I counted the humps of the roller coaster, one, two, three …five ….eight… eleven, twelve… fifteen. Only fifteen ascend and descend, how long could it possibly take?
All I can say is, this ride is sure taking its own sweet time.
I open my eyes and the roller coaster is going up. There’s this alluring thing about getting nearer and nearer to the sky that I just couldn’t shut my eyes. But at the same time, I couldn’t stop feeling terrified, thinking about the moment when we’ll go straight down.
It’s just like life isn’t it? We keep wanting to reach the top, to be the best among the rest, to be the boss, to lead, to be the one whom everyone envies and to be the one who seems to have it all. ... Seems to have it all that is, because deep inside, as we make our way up, we fear coming down. We fear the impact of falling to the ground, the pain that we have to endure, the humility of falling, we fear losing what we all once had. ... What if, we embrace this fear ...?
As I feel myself going down once again, I realize, what goes up, must come down. And suddenly, I’m not so scared anymore.
I open my eyes and I’m falling again. But this time, I kept my eyes open.

Word Count: 453 words
Time: 34 minutes

I like compositions that start and end with the same lines ... Anyways , today I had my CID trail presentation . So glad it’s over . Now got two humanities projects to concentrate on though ... So busy . Lawls . My friend always busy with his life too . But today evening he drop by despite his sickness , to come find me . Idk ... He seldom have time for me ... Maybe he’s trying to make it up to me . Maybe cause he’s sick so he need hugs to make him feel better ( though I know I need the hug more than him ... ) . But no matter what his reasons are , I stupidly fell for him all over agains . :/

Recently like spam watch movie . :x Timeless Love with Kari and Amy , Hunger Games with Isabelle and Chenxi , Wrath of the Titans with my friend and just yesterday , Mirror Mirror with Amy ! I love watching movie with my friend especially . Cause i cans snuggle up to him , rest on his board shoulders , feel his warmth , watch him act cute in real life ... Like some happy little story right ? It ishh when it ishh , but it really aint when it aint ... Timeless Love was so damn memorable in the sense that we actually had a " little workout " before the show and the show was kinda senseless so we just kept laughing out loud and commenting the obvious flaws . :x

That aint my most annoying participant as audience . I think my worst was Hunger Games . Dunno why my stomach was actually feeling kinda upset by all the food ... Guess what , we bought popcorn , pizza , hotdog , drinks , nachos and that two even got bread . LOL . Then when there was this scene which was kinda bloody , i started feeling like wanna puke and made those disgusting going-to-vomit-but-neh sound . Noise actually . And i dunno what i was doing during the show but i think i was being really annoying cause it was kinda draggy at the beginning. And somewhere in the middle , I was waiting in fear and anticipation for the action and ending , end up it starts to feel very draggy agains . D:

` Mirror Mirror on the wall , can you ever stop my fall ?
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