wtf am i doing ,
Saturday, July 16, 2011 | 6:17 PM
I could always find words to describe myself , words to analyse the situation , songs to describe my feelings , quotes that say my emotions , but it had been quiet . I feel so so cold . Hate such indifferent feelings ttm . I either say things i dont mean or build silence around me that stings . I want to know what's wrong . Need to find out what's wrong . They say , " The most difficult phrase of your life ishh not when no one understands you . It's when , you dont understand yourself . " and personally , it's really messy inside there . Inside me .
"Nobody's Home"
I couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it everyday.
And I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make the same mistakes again.
What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Open your eyes and look outside, find the reasons why.
You've been rejected, and now you can't find what you left behind.
Be strong, be strong now.
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
Her feelings she hides.
Her dreams she can't find.
She's losing her mind.
She's fallen behind.
She can't find her place.
She's losing her faith.
She's fallen from grace.
She's all over the place.
Yeah,oh
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
Have always wanted to try writing a autobiography using third person narration ( where each and every character is referred to by the narrator as "he" , "she" , "it" , or "they" , but never as "I" or "we" (first-person) , or "you" (second-person) ) . Like the song "Nobody's Home" . The lyrics wrote "she" , but it could jolly well be the singer referring to her own emotions even if the noun wasn't "i" . .... If you get what i mean . But stories like this , you cant hear from other people's point of view which ishh why at the same time i dont really like it . I enjoy novels where they share the female lead's thoughts and then the male lead's feelings . And it's always the guy's actions that made me cry in de end .
Okays . Teh ah no emo now . :D Alot of bandsmen kept telling me , 哭了就过了 , cry and move on , learn and move on . Basic knowledge , common sense , something we face in life everyday . But how many of us just cry and got up , stumbled and get back to square one ? .... Not me . P: Have faith have faith . Faith . Such a beautiful word . 5 letters , my favourite no. , so beautifully brought together , sound so pleasing coming out from the mouth , not just a word , but a sound . Always have faith . Especially in yourself . ♥
Recently doing some chi compo shit . The kind where you have to discuss different values . Why ishh this value important , what ishh it's advantages / disadvantages , how to cultivate this value , examples to support your point etcetc. Sounds easy , just that it's in chinese ._. And the topic we have ishh "what values ishh important for a student leader" , recently de Champs lesson also talking about this leadership stuffs . Year 1 and year 2 also got listen till tired alr . My ans was .... nahh . gonna keep it for the next time . :x
FIRST TIME TOUCHING A DSLR TODAY ! (Y) Awesome ttm experience . Totally want one now . Photography ishh amazing . Let me try to recall what the guy said ... a photo ishh an image and graphy ishh a english suffix that describes the arts , so simply put , photography ishh an expression of art through the photos . Okays i'm being retarded . What i'm just trying to mean ishh that photography ishh a form of Art . Art with a capital A ! It's not something you cans describe easily . Anyways , i had a great time capturing the moments with the DSLR they lent us . If only i had all the time in the world to go around with that amazing camera and explore and see for myself what i cans get . Sigh . So gonna join the photography club in year 4 . :x
Oh and yours truly went to watch Transformer 3 with Kellie (L) at the JP cinema ytd night . Last minute after band prac . Ended veh late . And we had the front row . AH such HONORS . :/ There was so much actions and we're so not used to the blasting sounds that everything was just like spinning spinning and had no idea what was happening half the time . Trying hard not to feel that it was a waste of money or a waste of time when we could have watched the new harry potter movie which screens at the same time instead . Lawls .
COINCIDENTALLY , there was this part , where Optimus Prime ( and in case you dunno , he's the leader of the autobots ) told the male lead of the movie , to have faith . To have faith in themselves when their support ishh gone . To have faith that they cans stand on their on feet . To have faith even if the whole world ishh going against you . So reflecting my current situation and feeling of desperation . Post next time . :)
" You give me the kind of feelings people write novels about . "
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